Category Archives: Change

“YOU” Problems….

Like I always say…it’s not one thing on this Earth that happens by chance.  Everything under the sun has a predetermined outcome…eventually…what is meant to happen…will happen.  Again…the delay might manifest…but the denial will never appear (you’ll catch that)…for the simple fact of…how that thing is supposed to be will be.

It’s been a long time people…way longer than I anticipated…but hey like I just said…it was the delay…not the denial…lol.  I mean…it’s been soooo long…I bet some of you need a refresher course (that’s crazy…lol)…so here we go.  I don’t proof-read…filter or check over my work.  I feel that what comes out…comes out…jacked punctuation…bad grammar…misspellings…ooh well.  My writings are straight raw…as they say…straight shot…NO CHASER.  Also…I’m a storyteller of sorts…God gives it to me differently….you know kinda like a movie in my head and I just let it flow through words.  Okay…enough of that…let’s keep this train moving…

The other day I was at work minding my business…mingling with a few guests…and this young lady started to ask me questions out the blue.  I’m not really tripping…because that happens more than you would think.  I think it’s kinda different how a person would just spill their guts out to a stranger…so as I am talking to her…I began to doodle all the advice that I said to her…and when I was done it was like the Picasso of advice on a notepad…it kinda went something like this…

One can’t expect to take action and not have a reaction.  Placing stock in man is like placing a dozen of eggs in a wet paper bag…

The adversary operates in confusion…and as long as you keep that same clueless confused company will continued to be shackled…

Class is in session…your business is your business…when you allow the world to see…you are merely giving them an open invitation…an invitation that comes with presents…presents of dysfunction…envy and jealousy.

One thing I know is that one can’t keep something that doesn’t have the desire or intention of being kept…if that thing is kept by manipulation and deception then bitterness is conceived…and once  bitterness is birthed…it is an enormous baby to handle.

Ladies and GENTLEMEN too…understand your worth…stop devaluing yourself because another person feels a certain way.

It is a huge difference between being patient and stagnant…patience births fortitude…while stagnation is the love child of bitter and unhappiness.

Learn when to end a relationship (and I’m not just talking about affairs of the heart)…the ending of a relationship should make you BETTER not BITTER.  If you are ‘bitter’…that’s a ‘you’ issue…not a ‘them’ problem.  Only you can allow a situation to rob your joy.

Now what am I talking about folks…I’m talking about ‘you’…understand that the only thing that you control is you…When you take possession of your own self and live your life…you never have to worry about anything else…Be comfortable in your skin…you are the only person that has to wear it…

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Posted by on July 16, 2013 in Change


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Delayed…But Not Denied Part II

                Seems like it has been forever in a day since I have been able to write a blog…well I guess because it has been forever in a day since my last post. Lately God has been removing many things from my life…of course for my good, but when God is whipping you into shape…at times it can be overwhelming…but through it all…His grace is sufficient to sustain us through each phase of our journey.

                 I remember a story that I heard about 10 years ago.  I was listening to a sermon from T.D. Jakes and he began to speak on denial.  There was a young boy…ummm I would say around 13 or 14 years old.  His father had a pocket watch he so desperately wanted.  The pocket watch was an heirloom passed down from father to his oldest son at the age of 16.  The son was excited because he knew in a few short years that the watch would be his.  As the day approached closer and closer to his 16th birthday, the boy was brimming with excitement.  Sometimes when the father would sleep…the last boy would go in his father’s room and try on the watch.  Finally, it was the boys 16th birthday and it was his time to receive the watch.  His birthday came and went…but his father never game him the watch.  The son thought that maybe his father just forgot about the watch…until he seen his father still wearing the watch every day.

                A few years went passed and the son actually despised the watch.  What was so special about the watch that his father didn’t give it to him?  His father received the watch on his 16th birth date…just like his grand-father and great grand-father…but why not him?  Another year or two goes passed and it is the son’s 21st birthday.  His father walks in his room and sits on the bed next to his son.  His father begins to talk to him about life.  Meanwhile, mid conversation he hands his son a box.  The son opens the box and it is the watch.  Astonished and amazed…the son is speechless.  Before the son could even say a word his father says to him, “Son, I waited to give you this watch.  Not because you did not deserve it, not because it is not yours, but because you were not ready.”

                This is what God does to us…a delay in the outcome doesn’t mean that there is a denial with the blessing.  Often God wants us in position to receive what He has in store for us.  If He gives it to us sooner than we are supposed to have it…we will never began to appreciate the importance of the gift that He has entrusted us with.  Through our immaturity, we will either not nurture it properly or completely neglect it. What I have learned over time…age does not signify maturity…it is merely a barometer that gets you one day closer to death.  True maturity is quantified by actions.

                So…the next time you want something extremely bad and don’t receive it…If God promised it to you…it is yours…but in due time.  Be great stewards over small things…and He will make you a steward over many.  See even though God knows the outcome…it is you that must make the correct decisions in life.  Place yourself firmly rooted in God’s promise…remember a delay is not necessarily a denial…sometimes it just means…not right now!

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Posted by on April 29, 2013 in Change


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Have you ever loved…

…someone or something so much that it makes you cry?  Boy…I tell you…that is the absolute case for me.  A few short weeks ago decided to take a trip down memory lane.  It was about four in the morning and for some reason I found myself stuck…literally could not sleep.  For the life of me I couldn’t understand why, because I had been up over 24 hours.  During the midst of my wake apnea (a phrase I coined a while ago for insomnia) I strolled over to my PC…one that  I hadn’t logged on in probably six to eight months…and even then I just used the Microsoft Office apps.

As I shifted through the “my documents” folder, I began to lose myself in the moment.  I made the choice to open EVERY single file on this computer.  Clicking the folders one by one I arrived at my very first class I attended once I re-enrolled in college…ENG 111.  Wow…even though this class was about five years ago, I remember everything about it…at least I thought…then it happened.  I clicked on the my second paper I wrote…Reading the paper, I instantly began to tear up until the bottom of my eyelids overflowed to the brim with tears…each tear drop flowed from both of my eyes like a rushing stream.  In this moment…all I could think of is him…the man that I loved more than any other man on this planet…My Father…My Dad…My Best-Friend…the man that wasn’t my biological father…but you couldn’t tell me that wasn’t my dad…the man that has helped shape the very being on the person typing the blog….let me share with you a small excerpt of this paper….

My father is far from perfect…but everything that he did to me, he always had my best interest at heart.  I absolutely love him for that.  I am going to take the core values my father instilled in me and teach my son.  I hope with what I learned from my father, my son will be a better person than me and my father combined.

What makes this so special is that my father…he succumbed to issues of the heart and went on to glory just a few short months ago.  Over the course of my collegiate life I have written hundreds of papers…and this one here…I will hold deep down in the depths of my heart.  Understand this people…time will not wait for no single person.  Cherish each moment as it was your last.  Love more than you want to breathe…If I could would love breath back into my father’s body…

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Posted by on January 23, 2013 in Change


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The Devil Doesn’t Live Here Anymore….

I want to do something different with this post.  God works with me extremely different than He does with other people.  Well let me take that back…I’m not sure how He deals with you…so for that fact I will scale back from what I just said.  I guess what I need to say is that God works with me on several different levels.  He typically allows me to observe a situation…and then allows me to see this situation in slow motion…other times…He drops things in my spirit…but every so often He gives me a dream when He really wants to get something across to me.  He typically uses things that are strong in my life to get drive His point…last night was one of those “dream” nights.  So what I decided to do is blog about my dream…but in poem form.  This is the first time I’ve done something like this…but I just had the urge to do something different…so I’m about to sit back and allow it to do whatever it wants to do…and I pray through these stanzas that someone is blessed…

Get out of my life…
Why are you here…
Who gave you the right
To even be in my life.
Don’t you know that it was you
It was you that choose to do what you do
It was you that held the key
It was you that gave me the key
So why do you question me
Because it was you that gave me the right to be in your life
Get out my life
Why are you here
What is it that you want
Why are you bothering me
Just go ahead and go
You had your time
You ran your course
You and I are not for better or worse
Why do you talk to me like this
It’s me that you are calling telling me you miss
The things that I do
Don’t try to turn my do to a did
I’m gonna always be where you end…and where you begin
You gave me this key
I don’t have to go
So continue to complain
It’ll be you dealing with the pain
As for me…I will be me
I will be alright
Because I have a key
And I have a right
I’m sorry you have no right
I’m even willing to fight
To get back my life
That you are trying to steal
This is my life…I have dominion…
You have no right
Yes I do…remember everything you gave me
You gave me a piece of you
You gave me a part of your virtue
Now that tie can’t be broken
And I am here
Psst…come close…psst come near
Let me tell you this
You laid with me and now we are one
We are tied at the soul never to be undone
The devil is a lie
It’s time for you to go
Right or wrong your purpose is done…on purpose
So pack your bags its time to fly so I can enjoy me and mine
Ha…think it is that easy
That easy for me to go
I have a key
This is my home
I can come and go
Remember it was you that let us in
It was you that loved to sin
Now you try to make me go
Excuse me sir…I don’t think so
Let me tell you this…
Remember that choice…I would be remised
Not to bring up all those times
All the doors that you opened
All the distractions and attractions that gave you carnal satisfaction
You just can’t dismiss this
It is this that you will surely miss
Come over here…give me a kiss
Why are so looking so confused…so disheveled
Hey you…come dance with the devil
Get out my house
This is my house you don’t belong
Take you…all of yall and leave
This is my home…this is my place
Now it is time for you to depart this place
I am no longer that person
I have changed…
No…its not the more things change…the more the remain
You are not welcomed here
Leave fast…or I’m gonna whip your…
See I told you I’ve changed
Before I would have said it
But not now…I know how to stand proud
So GET OUT MY HOUSE right now
You no longer have the right to be in my life
While you’re at it leave the key at the door
I don’t want to see you anymore
One thing I know is that God has my back
We are fighting back…we are on the attack
And I command you not to come back
Psst now you come here…let me tell you something
I can stand up boldly and proclaim
I don’t need you now or never
As for me…I’m doing better
So leave the key at the door
Devil your lust don’t live here no more
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Posted by on April 2, 2012 in Change


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Know your own strength…

This was initially supposed to be a small Facebook status, but the more I typed…the more came out, so I decided to share this with everyone.

Probably the realest status I’ve ever posted. For four years now the months of February and March has given me a different set of emotional issues. It was February when my dad died and march when wife died. As I set in traffic on the highway listening to this gospel playlist…a song that was sang at Ronya’s funeral came on…I HAVE NEVER BEEN ABLE TO LISTEN TO IT AGAIN WITHOUT JUST BREAKING DOWN…but today no tears…no breakdown…just a smile.

Psalms 30:5….weeping may endureth the night but joy cometh in the morning.

My night might have been a little longer than others…but my Sun did shine. So with all this being said family…press through your storm. Don’t give up. It’s all in God’s perfect plan and divine timing. Don’t be scared of a little rain. All plants need water to grow. Understand this…if you are not dead…it made you stronger. You must recognize and utilize the strength that you now have. There
is not much worse in the entire world than not knowing your own strength.

Be blessed all and have a tremendous day. This might be the only time someone hears this today…hey you!….yeah you…I LOVE YOU.


Posted by on March 15, 2012 in Change, Me, Motivational Thursday, Religious


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Sometimes it is the Hardest Thing to do…

…letting a person go.  Every so often…and I am willing to bet a dollar to a dime that we all come to a point when we must end a “ship” in our life.  Some are easier than other to walk away from.  Today, I was faced with an ultimate decision…should I keep a person in my life…or should I continue to subscribe to these internal emotions that I have suppressed on the inside of me and ignored for an extraordinary amount of time.  Before I made the decision a number of things entered into my mind (and I will come back to this at another point).

“When I let go of what I am, I become what I might be.” – Lao Tzu

Just the other day I wrote a post about Seasons, Reasons, and Lifetimes.  The crazy thing is…I was oblivious to the fact that this blog would come back and speak to me.  Life is an amazing thing I tell you.  People in your life are even more amazing.  Just take a moment to think about all the people who you encounter on a daily basis…how many people you pour into physical, mentally, emotionally, spiritually…and vice versa…people that do the same things to you.  The number is quite alarming.  The funny thing is…at times we don’t even have a clue that we accomplish these things for others.

Courage is the power to let go of the familiar.Raymond Lindquist

Sometimes the hardest thing to do…is letting a person go.  Pulling the trigger on a “ship” is like a game of never-ending tug-of-war…it doesn’t seem like anyone would be victorious.  It’s like you are playing this balancing act between your heart and mind…and anytime that is the case…you’re in trouble.  The heart can make the mind feel something it can’t understand…and the mind can make the heart understand something that it can’t feel (think about that for a second). but just because a person is riding your bus, doesn’t mean that they are to get off at your bus stop.  That goes back to slotting people accordingly.  I believe life is about many things…but a fundamental attribute to living is joy and being successful via making the correct decisions.  Choosing the right people to encompass you is a slippery slope…one must have a strong sense of discernment.  If you can’t discern properly, that is how seasonal people get lifetime privileges.

“Change is never easy, you fight to hold on, and you fight to let go.” – The Wonder Years

Remember this…when progressing in life…have the ability to make the correct cuts.  Removing folks out of your life is not mean…it is necessary for progression.  Example if you are a recovering drug addict…chances for full-blown recovery are better if you associate yourself with people who are not addicted to drugs.  It is foolish to keep yourself around the same people you did before when you were getting high.  Relapse is a real possibility if so. Congregate with people who strive for you to be a better person.  Leaving situations behind is the harsh reality of life…don’t be afraid to make the pertinent cuts…its okay…God has many band-aids for the wounded. What happens when you don’t let people go…you handcuff your reality and insist on living a perception of your life.  It’s hard to go…but I gotta leave. Don’t be afraid to let people you know, become people you knew.

“There are things that we never want to let go of, people we never want to leave behind. But keep in mind that letting go isn’t the end of the world, it’s the beginning of a new life.” –Unknown




Posted by on December 30, 2011 in Change, Me


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Short-Term Investments…Long-Term Attention…

With the upcoming New Year…I know many people are creating a list of resolutions that they plan to achieve this upcoming year.  My advice to many of you is this…exactly what the title of this post states, but I’m going to add two additional words that will change the entire dynamic of the title…STOP GIVING…short-term investments…long-term attention.  This is a major problem for many of us…because ace numero uno…most people look for immediate returns and are incapable of waiting for a delayed return…well incapable is a harsh word… they don’t exhibit the patience that is needed to endure a long-term return.

See…check this out…when a person attacks short-term investments…with long-term aspirations it never works.  That investment is current usage.  It is not made to endure longevity.  Have you ever sat back and wondered why you always seem to get the same response or end up arriving at the same place you always have?  Much of that has to do with the investment period…it is slotted incorrectly.  Let me put a spin on this…discern the type of investment…and attend to it as it is needed to be.  Let me go slightly deeper…all of us have people, circumstances, situations…whatever in our life that gives us trouble. Even deeper…there are persons in our lives that have been a part of our lives forever…and it seems like it is just a never-ending cycle of foolishness.  It is not that this particular person is a bad person…the fact of the matter is that you’ve slotted them incorrectly.  They are short-term investments…stop granting them life-time benefits…

Seasons, reasons, lifetimes….

People come into your life for a reason, a season or a lifetime.
When you figure out which one it is,
you will know what to do for each person.

When someone is in your life for a REASON,
it is usually to meet a need you have expressed.
They have come to assist you through a difficulty;
to provide you with guidance and support;
to aid you physically, emotionally or spiritually.
They may seem like a godsend, and they are.
They are there for the reason you need them to be.

Then, without any wrongdoing on your part or at an inconvenient time,
this person will say or do something to bring the relationship to an end.
Sometimes they die. Sometimes they walk away.
Sometimes they act up and force you to take a stand.
What we must realize is that our need has been met, our desire fulfilled; their work is done.
The prayer you sent up has been answered and now it is time to move on.

Some people come into your life for a SEASON,
because your turn has come to share, grow or learn.
They bring you an experience of peace or make you laugh.
They may teach you something you have never done.
They usually give you an unbelievable amount of joy.
Believe it. It is real. But only for a season.

LIFETIME relationships teach you lifetime lessons;
things you must build upon in order to have a solid emotional foundation.
Your job is to accept the lesson, love the person,
and put what you have learned to use in all other relationships and areas of your life.


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Posted by on December 28, 2011 in Change


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