…God thank you!
Monthly Archives: January 2009
The glory of friendship is not the outstretched hand, nor the kindly smile, nor the joy of companionship; it is the spiritual inspiration that comes to one when you discover that someone else believes in you and is willing to trust you with a friendship.- Ralph Waldo Emerson
Most of my Monday Morning Kraze ideas are spawned by conversations that I have with my friends and employees. A few days ago…Saturday to be exact…I was talking to a good friend of mine while I was shopping for #2. For whatever reason we started to speak on relationships…specifically man/woman relationships. The thought crossed my mind while I was having this conversation…that there is just things in a relationship that a woman should not say…and if she feels the need…TELL ONE OF YOUR GIRLFRIENDS…so this is a list for women…women..what not to say to your man:
- Please avoid any variations of the sex question..UNLESS you are willing to deal with the aftermath..so do not ask him about past experience…positions…favorites…which one of your friends he would sleep with…proceed with caution!
- What do you want from this relationship? This question literally SCARES men off…sometimes we just like the current state of affairs. If he is not cheating…dont rock the boat.
- This is not a question…more of a statement. I think my period is late. Do not tell him or even remotely hint of anything like that..UNTIL you know for sure that you have missed your period.
And the #1 thing not to ask you man…….
- IS THAT IT….hahahaha…sometimes you just have to suck it up and take one for the team!
- Is that your dad? I used to date him back in the day.
- I used to be Joan of Arc in a former life
- Give me like 10 mins…I need to take a shower first….
…I was sitting here this morning thinking…well it actually started last week…anywho whenever it was I was thinking about passion compared to occupation…how we get so consumed with our occupations…we forget about what our true passion. Im convinced that to achieve total blissfulness it is imperative to have a competitive balance of passion and occupation…I call it the “smiles and cries” theory.
I like my job…but I love my co-workers…my job pays my bills and allows me the oppurtunity to do other things…but my job is completely different than my passion…My occupation by day is a Logistics Manager…but I double as student as well …but my passion is working with children (coaching and mentoring)…spending time with my children…writing and most importantly serving God. As my mind started to churn I thought about my purpose in life and how to achieve this competitive balance…and even though I believe I have most of the answer…Im unsure about this one…people tell me…how do we create that competitive balance??? Maybe this might help me with all of this dysfunction Im experiencing.
…I did not comment of the significance of the next two days. Even though Martin L. King Jr.’s birthday is January 15…the nation recognizes his birthday today January 19. Is it a problem to me the day it is recognized?…not really…I’m just happy that he is being acknowledged…and on a national level. I don’t plan to make this a deep post but there is something that I want to share. I am extremely proud of my heritage…I live in a suburb of Dayton, Ohio…for you that don’t know that is in southwest Ohio. My suburb is about roughly 90 percent white…with 8 percent black…even though race rarely comes into play…every now and then it rears its ugly head…it doesn’t bother me…I just want folks to know that we are not in the 60’s anymore and I won’t tolerate it!
This post is to celebrate this historic relevance of our first black president. I’ve been moved to tears during this entire process. I remember the days leading up to the election I told a friend of mine that this election will not even be close…and it wasn’t. I always thought that there would be a black president, but never in my wildest dreams would I think that I would be able to physical live through it and experience it with my children. I pray for President Obama because he will be up against force…both seen and unseen that no other president had to ever endure…no matter the color of our president…I feel that America needs to band together during these present economic times for the well-being of this great country…
This is not about me…but I do need to included this tibit…I talk about my dysfunction all the time…and one of my downfalls is music…I love all music…but the other day I was listening to Young Jeezy…and I know I’m about to get the comments…but today I really listened to the words of this particular song and I want to share them with you…some of these lyrics are graphic and I really wont censor much but read these words…This is from his song “My President”…
If he could speak down from heaven he’d tell me stay on my grind
Tell him I’m doin fine, Obama for mankind
We ready for damn change so y’all let the man shine
Stuntin on Martin Luther, feelin just like a king
Guess this is what he meant when he said that he had a dream
So I’m sittin right here now man
It’s June 3rd haha, 2:08 AM
N____ I won’t say win, lose or draw
Man we congratulate you already homie
See I motivate the thugs right
You motivate us homie, that’s what it is
This a hands on policy, y’all touchin me right n____
Yeah, first black president, win, lose or draw n____
Haha, matter of fact, you know what it is man
Shouts out to Jackie Robinson, Booker T, Washington homie
Oh you ain’t think I knew that shit?
Sydney portea what dey do?
Haha, my president is black
The lyric that really hit me was the June 3rd reference…that is widely regarded as the day that Barack won the Democratic nomination…it is truly amazing what gets your attention…
I have a dream that one day this nation will rise up and live out the true meaning of its creed: “We hold these truths to be self-evident: that all men are created equal.” I have a dream that one day on the red hills of Georgia the sons of former slaves and the sons of former slaveowners will be able to sit down together at a table of brotherhood. I have a dream that one day even the state of Mississippi, a desert state, sweltering with the heat of injustice and oppression, will be transformed into an oasis of freedom and justice. I have a dream that my four children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin but by the content of their character. I have a dream today. – Rev. Dr. Martin Luther King
…one of my favorite things to do is have a stimulating conversation. There is nothing like talking to a person that makes you think…like Brain says…”step up ya game”…another thing about me is that I NEVER want to be the smartest person in my circle…I always want to have a measuring stick…something to give me motivation…I have a Principles of Management class that I take on Saturday mornings. There is only five total people in the class including the professor…I can honestly say that easily I am not the smartest in the room…now I feel like I do have the most potential to succeed and have the genetics to be the smartest…but presently constructed…nada…lol.
In this class there is the Assistant Fire Chief of the city…the professor is a VP of a company in the area…another is in the process of opening up an upscale restaurant and the last one…hahaha…I’m smarter than (hahaha…hope she never reads this)…but anywho we were talking about job interviews and what not to say or ask in an interview….instantly this sparked an idea for a post…so without further ado…here is the latest installment of Monday Morning Kraze…..
When asking a potential employer questions please do not say:
“Do I have to drop urine” Are you serious…just right here you are implying you are a chronic “chronic” smoker…or have potential meth tendencies. Steer clear of illegal drug question.
“When does my sick days/vacation start” Right here you are telling the employer…“Im going to call-off at least twice in my 90-day probationary period.” Keep those to yourself. Concentrate on getting hired and read the handbook once you are hired.
“Can I use my phone to call my ride?” Gettouttahere…lol…this screams...”I am unreliable and public transportation is my car.” Now I am not knocking public transportation and those that utilize it…but on an interview say you have reliable transportation.
….I don’t have a problem with the jumping of the broom thing…you know marriage…tying the knot…holy matrimony…whatever you would like to call it…I am an advocate of marriage and especially anything that has to do with family. Lately the family has been under tremendous attack…so count me on board of the uplifting and empowerment of the family.
I was writing this post kind of to piggyback my dude Will’s or Neva Will (whoever he is for the day…even though I think Neva Will wrote this particular one)…well at least the title and some of the content. Many of you already know the stance I have with relationships and women…you know…yada yada ya…I can continue on that course…but would that really benefit me to recommence slapping this dead horse? Really none…but just a ginormous amount of angry women at D.A.V.I.D. (and I think that I am really learning my lesson…hahaha…NOT)…anywho…I just will not go there today.
Beyonce has this Single Ladies song…I know you have heard it…they play this joint everywhere. I went to this country gas station the other day and the clerk was even listening to it…so I know that the majority of you have heard it…well needless to say…the hook of the song goes like this:
Cuz if you liked it then you should have put a ring on it
If you liked it then you should put a ring on it
Don’t be mad once you see that he want it
If you liked it then you shoulda put a ring on it
I purchased this Beyonce: Sasha Fierce CD for #2 as a Christmas present…and for the record…She was walking around the house listening to it and I finally started to pay attention to the words and it kind of sparked an interest in me…then I spoke with Brain after I was kinda having a writing block and he spewed out a few topics that I should write about. As I contemplated which of these topics I should write about…it started to become clearer the more I heard #2 sing what I wanted to speak on….
Follow me for a second people (and lets hope I don’t get sidetracked)…most of the women I know and have encountered over time all have the same goal…to have this family with a white picket fence…successful career…beautiful euphorian filled family…blah blah…you get my drift. Somewhere down the line…the dynamic of the traditional family changed…it went from the man as the sole bread-winner to this new and improved independent woman…that can do it all by herself…Im staying on track people… I know that in some cases women were forced to revert to playing the role reversal game…but I think that this should be the exception…but lately it is becoming the rule due to some of us men.
Okay…Im getting there…let me paint this picture and tie this all in…if you see a man/woman with an uniform with shiny shoes…badge on their chest…holster with a glock in it…waist band with a night stick and handcuffs driving a vehicle with red and blue lights…it is safe to assume that this person is a cop…right? Well this same person can not (in the same uniform) lineup across from 6’5″ 350 lb defensive lineman and play in a football game….that is just not feasible…but if the “cop” chooses…he can go put on the proper equipment so he is able to play in the game….feel me?
This is where Im going with this…a woman can not expect to play in a game if she is not properly equipped (dressed)…how can a woman honestly feel that she will be able to obtain this “white picket fence” thing if she dresses inappropriately…am I off people? I have a friend (who shall remain nameless) that wonders why she can’t find a decent man…I told her the first thing that she needs to do is change the way she is dressed…men tend to generalize things…I’m not saying all…but the majority of men have this prey and conquer mentality embedded in our DNA…Brain and I talk about this often. Men think if it walks like a duck…quacks like a duck…then it’s a duck…we tend to think that since she is scantily clad…she is hot between the legs. Women might think…if it walks like a duck…quacks like a duck…it could be a duck…BUT what type of duck…or is it really a duck…it be something else…and who came up with the word duck anyway…see where I’m going with this…things are not as cut and dry with women. This particular woman could dress that way because she was overweight her entire life and dropped a lot of weight…and she is happy just to be able to wear those type of clothes…I mean it could be anything….who knows…but it goes back to you cant dress like Pamela Anderson and expect to be treated like Michelle Obama…you attract what you do because of who you are…..
“She wore far too much rouge last night and not quite enough clothes. That is always a sign of despair in a woman.”- Oscar Wilde
“We are beginning to wonder whether a servant girl hasn’t the best of it after all. She knows how the salad tastes without the dressing, and she knows how life’s lived before it gets to the parlor door.”- Djuana Barnes